If we ever saw someone eating a meal all by themselves at a cafe, we usually feel inherent pity. We assume they’re waiting for someone, or have been stood up. “Maybe they’re enjoying some alone time” is not the first thought that comes to our mind. We’re afraid to be termed lonely; we forget that it’s not the same as being alone. For humans, being by ourselves happens when other plans get cancelled (or when we decide that getting out of pyjamas takes too much effort). Turns out, scheduling a quality evening with yourself is one of the most important aspects of self-care.

Larry Rosen– a psychology professor and author of The Distracted Mind, talked to The Cut about how spending time with ourselves helps us get the creative juices flowing and sharpens our mind. The article further says, “Since there’s more space for you to focus on one thing at a time when you’re alone, there’s also more room for daydreaming and epiphanies to occur.” It also helps us get our life on track (albeit briefly) as we rethink our priorities. So before you take your ex-partner back for the 3rd time, maybe spend an evening by yourself?

The grave dilemma is not whether we should spend time alone; it’s instead, the worry that we wouldn’t know what to do. We’re here to give you six ways of passing the time when you decide to take a break from socializing (even if it’s virtually).

Clean up– Take up that one chore that you’ve been putting off for months, whether it’s finally switching up your wardrobe or clearing out old bags with layers of dust on them. Re-organizing your home will make you feel more in control of things and can be almost a therapeutic affair.

Go after that obscure hobby– Try skipping your usual pastime and find something you find interesting. Be it your obsession with model trains or looking for places on google earth, there is no one to judge– and that’s the best part about being alone, right? We have the internet to fulfil our curiosity about every peculiar question mankind can possibly think of. Maybe it’s time to go beyond what you think you can do.

Go on a date with yourself- One of the most calming things you can do is to visit the local spots in the city by yourself. Explore your city and its people. You’ll be surprised how fun it can be to sit in a quiet place and people-watch. It sounds creepy, but it’s one of the most ordinary but exciting things to do. Normalize going to the movies, a theatre show, or a music gig alone. Consuming good art never needs a crowd.

Make a vision board- Setting your top goals for life will always help you work towards them. Be extra and make a collage of your future achievements. You can jot them down in a locked note on your laptop.

Journaling- One of the biggest reasons we avoid spending time alone is the existential-burden of over-thinking. It might sound cheesy, but writing a journal can significantly help set yourself free. Plus, it’s always fun to revisit these diaries years later and look at how far you’ve come.

Take up a new challenge- This could be anything that is part of your immediate goal. It can be a fitness challenge, finally learning how to cook, fixing your sleep schedule, learning that software, driving, or any soft skill you want to master. Identify your goal, establish a plan, and start working toward making it possible. Try not to wait for that one Monday to arrive.

To post on social media about loving ourselves, we have to get to know ourselves. Spending time alone is more than binge-watching a show on Netflix or scrolling through our phone. Leave behind the woes of everyday life and have some fun with yourself (We know how that sounds; it does make for a great suggestion though!)